4.5.14

I've heard ... before (I was gonna say recently, but it wasn't recently) that blog and Facebook profiles and all the stuff we post on the internet about ourselves is filtered and edited and ultimately a false representation of ourselves.

Totally true.

But, I still love looking at beautiful, seeminly perfect people's blogs and how they have endless candid photos of themselves (seriously, do they have a photographer following them around all day?) and they go on amazingly fun vacations and on and on. My life isn't like that. I like to pretend sometimes, and at this hour I can't think straight enough to try and analyze why I would do that, but that's OK because the point of this post is to even things out a little bit. I'm going to give you a glimpse of my life. My real, unedited life. It won't be pretty, but it must be done.

Alright, so, today. I didn't roll gracefully out of bed, tangled in crisp white sheets, the soft morning light streaming in through the lemon trees and my open window as a breeze brushed my cheek. Nuh-uh. I fumbled for my phone, yanking it from the charger, nearly choked to death as the green, thrift-store sheets latched on to my dried skin, my hair resembling a dead badger and my rancid breath seeping through cracked lips as I stumbled to the bathroom. Picturesque, am I right?

And can you believe the conversation I had with myself today?

"Wow, you've really gained some weight, huh?" It was a rhetorical question.

"Like you're one to talk. We can't even wear our pencil skirts we bought a couple years ago because SOMEONE'S butt has gotten so big."

"Ya know what? You can't go to the movies today. You've lost that privelage."

"HA! I wasn't going to anyway, you selfish----"

We'll stop there.

Wow. Let's just say Elizabeth's life isn't the fairytale you thought it was. Hobo bedding, bad breath, verbal abuse. Count yourself lucky you don't have to live this personal hell.

Alright, well, off to yoga and then my favorite cafe to write my feelings and have someone take photos of me doing it all.

Have a fantastic day! xoxo

P.S. I AM pretty fabulous, though, am I right? I mean, look at me!

2 comments:

  1. Haha you crack me up, especially that bit about yoga and the cafe.

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  2. Stop dissing my girl picture. You may inherit it one day.

    ReplyDelete