Went bouldering today. Ripped off a perfectly good callous on a V0. A V0! And it was no small callous, p.s. It reminded me of rings and monkey bars in second grade and the pride in showing off your mutilated hands. "See this? I got THIS blister yesterday when I skipped two rings." "Yeah, well, I got THIS one just today, when I swung past three monkey bars. THREE! Eat THAT!" (It was a big deal.)

When I got home, Jessica suggested I pour hydrogen peroxide on it, you know, to kill the germs.

"You do it," I said to her, hunched over the bathroom sink, hand hovering over the drain.

"K. Ready?"

As she began to pour the heinous liquid from the brown plastic bottle, I saw it hit my skin. "Hey, this isn't that ba --- OH MY GOSH!"

The next 30 seconds sounded something like this:

"AaaaaAAAAAAHAaaaaahaaaa! OhmygoshItStingssoBad! Make it stop. MakeITSTOP! Aaaaaahahaahhhahahaaaaaaa..."

As any good friend would be, Jessica was bent over, holding her stomach with one hand, covering her mouth with the other, gasping for breath amidst laughter.

I think next time I'll leave the germs be and avoid a repeat of what was one of the most horrific experiences of my life.


  1. Bouldering? What? You're killing me, E.

  2. I always blew on it, made the stinging not so bad. I realize now that probably put the germs back on but I somehow survived.